Remembering the son who left too soon

PETALING JAYA: For many years, Father’s Day meant good food, laughter and family time for Joseph Sinnappan.

The youngest of his three sons, Soosaimanicckam Joseph, was often at the heart of those moments, bringing warmth, laughter and energy to every gathering.

But Father’s Day has never felt the same since May 19, 2018. That was the day Soosaimanicckam passed away, just a week after reporting to KD Sultan Idris I in Lumut, Perak for cadet officer training with the Royal Malaysian Navy (RMN).

He died two months before his 27th birthday.

A postmortem attributed the cause of death to pulmonary oedema, or fluid accumulation in the lungs. In 2023, the Ipoh coroner’s court returned an open verdict over his death, saying it could not determine who was responsible.

The following year, however, the Ipoh High Court set aside the open verdict and ruled that Soosaimanicckam had died from leptospirosis, a bacterial disease spread through water contaminated by rat urine.

It also ruled that his death was a direct consequence of navy officers denying him medical treatment. The court then classified the case as homicide.

Yet beyond the court proceedings and legal rulings lies a family’s enduring grief. Today, Father’s Day celebrations continue with Joseph’s wife, children and grandchildren – but there is an absence that can never be filled.

Joseph, 71, told FMT Lifestyle he misses his son every day, though Father’s Day remains especially difficult. “The feeling is stronger. My whole family mourns the loss,” he said.

Joseph still remembers the moment his world changed: he was at home when he received a call from the navy informing him his son had died.

“I was shocked. I could not believe that my son had passed away.”

The news was especially hard to comprehend given that Soosaimanicckam had been physically active, and enjoyed long-distance running and swimming.

Fascinated by the maritime world, Soosaimanicckam had dreamed of joining the navy since his university days. He was also inspired by his brother, a police officer.

“He wanted to serve the country,” Joseph said.

That dream did not come easily. He applied several times before finally being accepted into the RMN.

Soosaimanicckam had looked forward to completing his training and making his family proud. He was also eager to celebrate his brother’s wedding, a milestone he never got to witness.

Joseph remembers not only those unfulfilled dreams but also the kind of person his son was.

“He was intelligent, good, humble, and very loving to his family members and friends,” he said.

Soosaimanicckam, Joseph added, had done well in his Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia and earned a scholarship for his tertiary studies.

While at university, he helped with his father’s part-time business, delivering haircare products for pocket money. He was also known for going out of his way to help others, especially the elderly.

Among Joseph’s fondest memories are the marathons they ran together and family trips, especially those by the sea. Those moments feel especially precious today.

Eight years on, the loss feels as raw as ever. “After my son’s death, my wife and I were very upset. Honestly, I could not sleep for a month.”

Memories continue to linger in everyday life: Joseph still finds himself calling out for “Sam”, the nickname he had used for his son.

“Sometimes, when I have some work, I’ll call, ‘Sam’, but he’s not there,” he said.

Alongside the grief, Joseph continues to seek answers about the circumstances surrounding Soosaimanicckam’s death.

Earlier this month, he submitted a memorandum to the Attorney-General’s Chambers and the police, demanding that the investigation be completed promptly.

Yet for Joseph, the case has always been about more than court proceedings and legal rulings. “No one can replace my son. Being my youngest, he was very close to me. We miss him very much.”

Birthdays, once celebrated at restaurants, are now marked differently. “We visit his grave to pay our respects,” Joseph added.

And during family gatherings, he still notices the empty space where his son should be.

As another Father’s Day arrives, Joseph continues to hold on to memories of the young man who loved the sea, cherished his family, and dreamed of serving his country.

And this father’s wish remains unchanged. “We believe in the fairness of the government in mitigating the due punishment that is enshrined in our constitution,” Joseph said.

“We really pray that he gets due justice and his soul gets to rest in peace.”