Transformation and the inner core

Challenges are times when we are compelled to make hard decisions. At the crossroads, the choices are perplexing. The obstacles seem overwhelming. The choices seem limited yet excessive. There is too much to juggle, too much to unravel and untangle. We see too many jigsaw puzzle pieces to take apart and to fit together again.

The big picture is hazy.

Would it ever make sense? This feeling of uncertainty, anxiety, and imbalance would explain, to a certain extent, what many people are undergoing.

These thoughts resonate with the experience of transition in one’s inner being.

A crisis triggers a cathartic change. The core is a temporary whirling, burning pattern. It is intimidating, confusing, anxiety-provoking, painful, heart breaking.

Here is an excerpt from the book The Other Side of Chaos: Breaking Through When Life is Breaking Down by Margaret Silf.

“When in transition, depending on how serious the breakdown is, we may feel as though almost every aspect of life has been disrupted.

“The old certainties, the old habits and comfort zones, have been dive-bombed.

“The old home, the old job, the old ‘me’ may almost be gone.

“What is that essential core of who I am that remains through all this upheaval?”

This important question triggers a new phase for growth, Ms. Silf remarked.

The core of being is not easily discovered until a strong force of change removes the outer layers of “certainties and securities.”

To illustrate, the seeds of eucalyptus trees would not be able to germinate until the time when they are exposed to intense searing heat such as that of a forest fire, for cleansing. When the shallow surface layers of the Self are peeled and stripped away, it is possible for the deeper part of oneself to emerge and be activated.

Sifting and wading through the many layers and untying the interlocked patterns of heavy baggage takes focused willpower and time.

It does not happen quickly. What needs to be purged is the hard crusty shell of toxic barnacles that have accumulated over the years.

The stripping process is about the essential elements of survival, growth, and transformation.

The new individual who emerges through the blast of change would be different. They would have deeper layers of “personal potential” that would be exposed and invited to flourish.

It is during disasters that one may discover surprising skills and strengths that are hidden within. They are “summoned” by the individual who is learning how to cope and manage an extraordinary situation. Among these qualities are resilience, patience, ingenuity, compassion, and much-needed empathy for others who are going through similar upheavals.

Most people must struggle and go through the fire of transformation alone. A few individuals may be fortunate enough to find a guru or a wise spiritual guide.

In the final analysis, beyond the extraordinary skills, social scientists say that one needs a sense of humor — to laugh through the tears and pain. One can have hope and a glimpse of infinity.

Philosopher Rainer Maria Rilke wrote, “Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves…

“Don’t search for the answers, which could be given to you now, because you may not be able to live them.

“The point is to love everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.” — “Letters to a Young Poet, No. 4”

Maria Victoria Rufino is an artist, writer and businesswoman. She is president and executive producer of Maverick Productions.

mavrufino@gmail.com