Astronomer had a problem no corporate handbook could solve.
Their CEO and head of HR got caught on a Coldplay kiss cam, ducking and twisting like teenagers who just realized the camera sees more than their spouses should.
The video went viral.
The memes wrote themselves.
The leadership duo resigned, but the internet never forgets.
This is the kind of scandal that brands usually respond to with a soulless “we remain committed to our values” statement no one believes and everyone scrolls past.
But Astronomer didn’t play it safe.
They went full Uno reverse.
They hired Gwyneth Paltrow — Chris Martin’s ex-wife — as their temporary spokesperson.
Yes, the ex of the man singing onstage while the scandal unfolded.
That’s either insane or genius.
In a video styled like a bad corporate training module, Paltrow deadpans, “I’ve been hired on a very temporary basis to speak on behalf of the 300-plus employees at Astronomer.”


